Feliz Dia del Estudiante - September 21, 2013

I've already described what happened here in my October blog post "Happy Birthday from Bolivia!"  Here are some more photos of the goings-on of that day.  :)  The kids are so super cute.  I wish I could give you names of the littler ones, especially my babies, but for their protection I can't.  Our kids arrive at the Hogar for so many different reasons (abuse - both physical and sexual, neglect, death of one or both parents, etc.)  so for their protection it's better not to identify who they are.  I wanted to share pictures of them though so that you get a little better picture of who they are and what life at the Hogar is like!  Love you all and miss you. :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The First Four Months

I'd give them the moon if I could. 

It's been almost four months to the day since I first arrived here in Bolivia... 120 days, and along with that, 120 reasons why my life has been changed forever.  They're on my mind constantly, from when I get up in the morning to when I go to bed at night... and even then, I dream of them, I am listening to Teresa's nonsensical babbling or trying to prevent Luchi from jumping in a giant mud puddle. 

They've stolen my heart... really, that's all I can say. 

I want so much for them.  I want parents for them, parents who love them.  I want them to know they are loved.  I want them to heal.  I want a long and happy life for each of them, for their little worlds to open up and expand.  I want a future for them.  I want them to have enough to eat, good healthy food.  I want them to become all that they can be, to develop more into the wonderful little people that they are, to become more of who God made them to be. 

If I could take them all in and be their mommy for always, I would.

I know it's been a while since I've written anything.  My days are so full!  I was waiting to write until I had pictures to accompany my writing... obviously that never happened.  So I thought I would just write something instead.

It's summer here in Bolivia.  Christmas has come and gone, much to the relief of Natalie and I, who can finally go back to sleeping.  Lots of people have come to bring a little bit of joy into our kids' lives, making breakfast for them, bringing them treats and gifts, throwing them parties.  Our choir had the opportunity to sing on Christmas Day at Our Lady of Mercy church across from the Plaza Principal, and last weekend they also went to Madre Rosario's hometown of Concepcion for another singing engagement.  A local, family-owned circus provided us all with the opportunity to visit the circus at the beginning of the summer; it was my first time at the circus, I think I enjoyed it as much as they did!

Last week Madre Rosario, Angelica, Avigail and I took the babies to the Rio Pitay and spent a good chunk of time squishing our toes in the river sand, wading in puddles (maybe that's where my dream came from!) and in the shallows by the river banks.  They were so cute!  Some of them even fell in!  Afterwards we all rode home in the back of the truck and they sang in their little high-pitched voices about the butterfly in the kitchen bringing chocolate for her mama, about the "finger family" and the sleeping bell ringer.  It was amazing.  I love rivers anyway, and rivers complete with 14 little ones makes it even more amazing. :)

Here are some of my favorite memories of the past four months, they make me smile and I thought maybe they might make you smile too:

• Luciana walking around with her little "gatito bonito" wrapped in a little red sweater, explaining that the cat was cold
• Holding Franz, who had just soiled his baptismal garments by dropping chocolate cake all over them
• Yoeli and Company dropping a dead bird down Natalie's back (yes, this really did happen!)
• Yorya helping me pass out spoons at lunchtime
• Helping Yudid name her teddy bear
• Ofelia's hugs
• Trying to snag a trufi ride home with Miriam and Yolanda right after spending a crazy day Christmas shopping at the Feria
• Having to help Sandra Mariana and Natalie out of the tree they got stuck in
• Tatiana's shoes left empty at the dining room door, to ensure she got the first place in the dinner line
• Watching Silvana transform from a sad, withdrawn, sick little girl into a very happy, joyful, playful little girl
• Lariza climbing on my back while I'm changing a diaper
• Francesca climbing like a little monkey and hanging upside down by her knees, all by herself
• Talking with Miriam
• Andrea giving me a friendship bracelet
• Yusel doing my hair for church
• Watching the girls completely passed out in the pews during the All Soul's Day Mass, when I'm pretty sure the name of every parishioner who'd ever died was read during the prayers of the faithful
• Leidy telling me "Good night," "Good morning," and "Good afternoon" in English
• Trying to find a way back into the Hogar at 3 am so we could put stockings on everyone's bed
• Feeling like I had a minor disciplinary breakthrough and emotional connection with Shirley
• Messi hugging me and hanging on my ankles so that it was hard to walk
• Helping Emilce hold Melani
• The way Adriana's hair stood straight up, and her little button nose
• Playing hide and seek with Alejandra while I did laundry; she would hide and I would try to catch her in the act of creeping from sink to sink
• Aiding and abetting Yudid in keeping a fugitive kitten
• The way Silvana hopped all the way home from mass
• Walking with Melani; holding her hands and letting her pull me around as she goes in quest of the ball.
• The way Teresa calls me "Mama" and sings with me
• How excited Anamaria was to make a Christmas card for her madrina
• The way Esperanza pulled her new mommy's pant leg and mine together to make us hug.
• The "sign of the cross" war I have with Nayeli
• How big Mercedes' eyes get when she's watching a princess movie
• Leidy showing me the black duck that lives on the roof of her school
• Watching thumb wars between Natalie and Mayra
• Being Yajaira's madrina for First Communion
• Deimar's cute little hugs around my legs, the way he leans his little head into them
• Holding Mariana as we went up the escalator at the airport for her first time
• Going with Mariela and Natalie to the waterfalls at Cuevas (where the fairies live!) and to the village of Samaipata
• being one of Santa's little elves on Christmas
• the night Joe and I figured out how to pray a decade of the rosary over Facebook Chat
• bringing Deimar's 102-degree fever down by telling him he was swimming in the rain, while he swam like a little fish in the shower
• the way Melani opens and closes her hand and scrunches up her face into a little smile when she's happy
• cuddling with Nayeli and Anyelina during the rosary
• the time Marisol candidly informed me that Snow White died when she ate the apple because she didn't wash it first.
• the time Brandy and the middle school girls at my table were throwing pieces of chicken on my plate
• reading fairy tales with the little girls
• playing bingo with them stretched out on the library floor
• spending the passing of the year talking outside with Madre Rosario and Natalie while the fireworks went off all around us
• singing "What Does the Fox Say?" with Franz
• kissing my babies goodnight, and them insisting on kissing me back

There are days that I wonder why I'm here.  There are days when one day blurs into the next, when everything seems to be going wrong, when I am frustrated out of my mind, when nothing makes any sense, when I am incredibly homesick.

But in the end, it's all been worth it.  I've made it a third of the way through.  My kids continue to embed themselves further into my heart, my mind, my soul.  My love for them grows daily.  And when I see their faces, when I look back on all the special, special memories I've made with them over the past 3 months, I remember why I'm here.

I'm here for them.

• 

• 
•